Sammy's Musings and Insights

To the jerk that was rude to me this morning while I was on the phone with AAA, and asked you for the address of where I was, just two words: F*** you!!! If you had wanted to help me by changing the tire, then you should have said something before I asked you the question, not ask me ambiguously, "Do you have a spare?" when it was clear to you I was on the phone and had no idea where I was. You get huffy over your macho pride and think you are insulted, with your "Well, screw you, I was going to help change it but forget it," well what about me? I am lost, I don't know where I am, I got onlookers looking at the damaged tire, thinking, oh, how did that poor girl get a flat, I'd help but I don't know how or I am going somewhere and I can't be late,which wasn't helping the situation at all, while I got my mother outside joining them in this verbal powwow of what to do, what to do? How was I supposed to know you wanted to change the tire? Did you...

It's been a long time since I have done anything with this blog, in fact I have ignored it for a long time, but now it is time to get the juices flowing and get back to writing again. I have decided on something that has been on my mind for a long time. For the last couple of years, okay the time, I have been not writing in here, I have been attending college in a library tech. program. Well, after some thought, and some inspiration from my lit class, I have finally decided to go back and get my bachelor's degree (in Liberal Arts, with English minor). The reason for this goal: I have always been the type who that liked learning, but what scared me was being stuck in the same field all my life, never moving forward. Most of my friends went to college as business majors or as education majors, which never appealed to me. I wanted a career that would allow me to think. I also have to blame the city I was living in. Most people are stuck in their same life, never moving forw...

Do you remember your dreams? Unfortunately, I don't. Someone just recently asked me what dreams do I hold that I want to make reality or what dreams that you had that you wanted to make real. I wasn't sure what to say at the moment other than remembered I hoped I wouldn't become my mother, who didn't find happiness until her sixties. Dreams and hopes and wishes have changed for me so much over the years. I remember one time I wanted to be a doctor, then a radio producer, then a wall street hot shot. Then nothing after that. I do have one which is to travel, see Paris, and Rome and London, and New York, like everyone else, maybe even see China or Japan. That one I am working up to gradually. But when my friend asked me what was my biggest dream, I was ashamed to tell him what it was: to fall in love again and get married and build a life with the intentioned Mr. Right. Why was I ashamed? Well, my friend is a marriage atheist, one of these men who believe love an...

I have to finally admit it--for a modern, independent girl like myself, I have an old-fashioned soul. I have old-fashioned ideals, not old-fashioned beliefs, mind you. I believe in pro-choice, I believe in woman's liberation, I am for gay marriage, I am a strong Democrat and I was once an atheist. In short, I am a modern day Maude Findlay. However, I do wish for the old-fashioned things as well, just not like all my friends ideals. I do want someone to love and love me back, but as the person I am. I look to have children one day, but I want there to be a father as well as a mother, and in a time and place where we can raise them in a stable environment. I also like an old-fashioned courtship, the type that is only in Cary Grant films, with maybe a bit of a Fred Astaire charm as well. Sort of like a Tom Hanks flirtation/dream as in "The Man with One Red Shoe". And the type of person I would like to share my life with, well, he would have to be intelligent, and arti...

I am going to start by telling you about a very strange dream I had the night before. I was at the bank making the usual Friday afternoon deposit for the library, same tellers, same bankers, same building. However, there were very many differences: 1)I was in there for three hours waiting to make the deposit. 2) some of the tellers were now actual loan officers, (mostly the men, but that is for a different entry later) 3) I felt a strange sadness waiting to give them our collection for the last week. And then when I finally got to the teller, while I was making the deposit and chatting with her, my personal banker came to the window to make an announcement to me: started off with some nonsense about how the bank will continue to provide quality service to me and to the library while advertising some sort of bonus or whatever, but then his speech changed and then I realized it was to congratulate me on a new job or promotion I received. While he was talking, I found myself getting e...

That's right--a chick lit novel, Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin. Chick lit is a new kind of genre for me, something I fairly like on occasion, but I never like to admit personally. I'm more into more serious, thoughtful book myself, but it never hurts to once in a while read a more fun-loving, original story about your life as well. Anyway, the heroine in the book, Rachel White, a 30 year old attorney in Manhattan, has just slept with her best friend's fiance, Dex, and has no regret over it. I wasn't sure I was going to have much sympathy for Rachel, basically for the misdeed itself, but after reading her point of view, and learned more about her "best friend" Darcy, who is a shallow, brainless twit, yet pretty and charming at the same time, the kind of girl we all hate, you can't help but feel more compassion for Rachel than Darcy, esp. since Rachel tries to do the right thing by first getting Dex out of her mind and be supportive to Darcy and her...

This I found in the Bible just now 1 Corinthians 7:25-40 . Not to hurt anyone who is married and happy, for those, God Bless You, but for us who are without spouses, unmarried, widowed, unattached in any way, this is a message of inspiration and hope and gives me strength and courage for the future. To the Unmarried and Widows 25 Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you. 29 But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, 30 ...