Religious beliefs
I know amongst many of my friends there is question of my religious beliefs, do I still believe in God, why attend a different faith, will there ever be a time I will return, etc. For those who still ponder this question: hang on a moment and I will tell you.
For those who do not know me, let me fill you in on some info:
As you know, I was born to parents of different denominations of the Christian faith, yet however they are very similar as well. My mom is devout Lutheran who took my sister and I to Lutheran church for two years only when she was struggling with personal issues of her own. She thought at the time she was an alcoholic. I don't know whether she was or not, but she was struggling with depressed, negative emotions as well. I was 10 years old.
My dad is a self-proclaimed Catholic, who has not set foot in a church since his confirmation. I found this out when the LDS visited our door the first time when I was 19 (at the time, it was the elders who visited).
During high-school, I was struggling with faith, and by the time my senior year came, I declared myself an atheist. When I was almost 21, I met the sister missionaries of the LDS and for a brief time joined the LDS. Now I have to confess, that although I did find what I learned in Mormonism interesting, my faith was still unsettled. Even after countless visits with missionaries, church gatherings, etc. I made really good friends, but faith still had come to me. So I did leave, and I thought it was for good.
However, three years passed during the time, and after a couple of dead-end jobs and broken dreams, and a mistake of an ex-boyfriend, faith finally came to me in 2006. I wasn't even looking for God. So visiting the LDS as well as other churches, I found my faith again. Now this should be the end of the story, right?
Yes and no. Yes I did find my faith, but no, did not find a church home. Also, at the time, I was trying to build back a life, and I was working in Fairfield at the time at night, and had to attend church over there in the mornings. I did try the LDS again, however, all the members were too young for me, and I wasn't in the market for a romance at the time. I know 26, I should be looking but I couldn't. Things were not in place for me.
Then I found St Marks Lutheran Church in Fairfield, went to a few services. It was there I decided to build my new home there. It was not an easy decision, believe me, but I was happy there, and faith was strong and it fit my current situation, so I choose to be baptized. Still visit from time to time, though now I live in Brentwood and will be honest, I still haven't transferred my membership because I am torn between two churches here: St. John's Lutheran in Antioch, and Immaculate Heart of Mary in Brentwood, and it's hard to decide because both congregations are very welcoming and have made friends in both. Plus, transferring membership would mean the final goodbye and I don't think I can do that. St. Mark's is where part of my family is.
Now, to answer the questions some of you still ponder: you must understand at 21, my life was in those periods where you are trying to define who you are and what you want to be. No one influenced my choice to leave LDS, the person who left is the one who influenced that decision. And I have to say, it may seem like a heartbreaking decision, and a very big mistake, but some of your family did the same thing as well. And some did come back, some didn't. I don't regret having to leave during that time, but if I hadn't, I wouldn't have discovered myself. And I did find God through your help and support later. In 2006, faith did find me and I had you to help nurture that faith, and support me while my ex was hooking up with anyone who would give him the time of day. I understand that some of you are confused if my faith journey ended up in a different direction, but what I learned about Christianity is this: we share one faith and love in Jesus Christ and God, plus we learn to love others and share a passion for faith. That is I think the most important thing here.
Will I ever visit LDS again or come back, can't say, I do know this: you were a part of the journey to faith over the last 10 years and helped in receiving faith, and I hope you know and remember that, and also, one other thing: I love you, and grateful that I met you in this journey.
For those who do not know me, let me fill you in on some info:
As you know, I was born to parents of different denominations of the Christian faith, yet however they are very similar as well. My mom is devout Lutheran who took my sister and I to Lutheran church for two years only when she was struggling with personal issues of her own. She thought at the time she was an alcoholic. I don't know whether she was or not, but she was struggling with depressed, negative emotions as well. I was 10 years old.
My dad is a self-proclaimed Catholic, who has not set foot in a church since his confirmation. I found this out when the LDS visited our door the first time when I was 19 (at the time, it was the elders who visited).
During high-school, I was struggling with faith, and by the time my senior year came, I declared myself an atheist. When I was almost 21, I met the sister missionaries of the LDS and for a brief time joined the LDS. Now I have to confess, that although I did find what I learned in Mormonism interesting, my faith was still unsettled. Even after countless visits with missionaries, church gatherings, etc. I made really good friends, but faith still had come to me. So I did leave, and I thought it was for good.
However, three years passed during the time, and after a couple of dead-end jobs and broken dreams, and a mistake of an ex-boyfriend, faith finally came to me in 2006. I wasn't even looking for God. So visiting the LDS as well as other churches, I found my faith again. Now this should be the end of the story, right?
Yes and no. Yes I did find my faith, but no, did not find a church home. Also, at the time, I was trying to build back a life, and I was working in Fairfield at the time at night, and had to attend church over there in the mornings. I did try the LDS again, however, all the members were too young for me, and I wasn't in the market for a romance at the time. I know 26, I should be looking but I couldn't. Things were not in place for me.
Then I found St Marks Lutheran Church in Fairfield, went to a few services. It was there I decided to build my new home there. It was not an easy decision, believe me, but I was happy there, and faith was strong and it fit my current situation, so I choose to be baptized. Still visit from time to time, though now I live in Brentwood and will be honest, I still haven't transferred my membership because I am torn between two churches here: St. John's Lutheran in Antioch, and Immaculate Heart of Mary in Brentwood, and it's hard to decide because both congregations are very welcoming and have made friends in both. Plus, transferring membership would mean the final goodbye and I don't think I can do that. St. Mark's is where part of my family is.
Now, to answer the questions some of you still ponder: you must understand at 21, my life was in those periods where you are trying to define who you are and what you want to be. No one influenced my choice to leave LDS, the person who left is the one who influenced that decision. And I have to say, it may seem like a heartbreaking decision, and a very big mistake, but some of your family did the same thing as well. And some did come back, some didn't. I don't regret having to leave during that time, but if I hadn't, I wouldn't have discovered myself. And I did find God through your help and support later. In 2006, faith did find me and I had you to help nurture that faith, and support me while my ex was hooking up with anyone who would give him the time of day. I understand that some of you are confused if my faith journey ended up in a different direction, but what I learned about Christianity is this: we share one faith and love in Jesus Christ and God, plus we learn to love others and share a passion for faith. That is I think the most important thing here.
Will I ever visit LDS again or come back, can't say, I do know this: you were a part of the journey to faith over the last 10 years and helped in receiving faith, and I hope you know and remember that, and also, one other thing: I love you, and grateful that I met you in this journey.
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